Entree vs. Side (No you don't need both to have a "complete" meal!)
Entree v. side? No this is not a food blog...lol. Over the last couple weeks there has been some talk about relationships and who has things better. First there is the "main" or "wifey" or the woman who is considered to be in a validated relationship with the man.What is a validated relationship? People know that person to be your significant other, they attend family functions with you, you have their picture on our desk or cubicle at work etc. The "side" or "jumpoff" is the other woman in your life that you spend time with but your family has never met them and your overall relationship is a secret.
It is said that the side girl has it better than the main girl because she has to deal with less heartache. I'm on the fence with that because yes the side doesn't have to worry about where her "man" is. But it has to be difficult to know your "man" is going home to someone else or that on holidays he will not be with you. If he dies tomorrow no one will call you. It takes a strong woman to deal with that. I feel like the side knows too much. The wife is oblivious most of the time and has no idea what is going on. If her and the side were in the same place the side can pick her out right away while the wife just sees her as another complete stranger. Even with all the perks of being wifey being on the side seems "more fun" - the man spends more time with you and sometimes more money too! I wish things were different but they aren't.
I'm at a point in my life where i cannot and will not be the woman on the side - at least not knowingly. I want my own man complete with all the heartache and pain that comes with being in love. Whenever I think about this subject I remember a line in one of Fabolous' songs where says "stick with your entree and get over your side". So that is my advise for men. I understand its like 8 to 10 women for every one man but try to think about your sisters, daughters and mothers, etc. when you are out there playing the field. There are way too many single ladies that are also single mothers because men want to have their cake and eat it too. This problem is a huge in "our" community. So to all the men who take care of their women and are overall good men.....KUDOS YOU ARE A DYING BREED!!!
